I evaluated a new home health patient yesterday: an 80-year-old man and his wife. They never had children and have been estranged from their siblings for years. They own a large home in a nice neighborhood and a piece of land in Arizona.

Last January, while the wife was in the front yard, her husband was inside preparing to start a fire in the fireplace. When he lit the match, there was an explosion that blew open the front door and threw him fifteen feet across the living room toward the door.

His wife ran inside the house to find flames inside and her husband lying at her feet. A neighbor across the street, an active police officer, and his adult son ran in and pulled the man into the yard. By then, the wife had fainted on the lawn.

They later learned there had been a gas leak just outside the house. They had no carbon monoxide detectors and never smelled gas.

The husband was rushed to the best burn unit in town and received excellent care and rehabilitation. Today, he is fully recovered except for a wound on his foot.

After hearing their story and realizing how close she came to losing her husband, I asked a question most people avoid:

Do you have your financial affairs in order? If you had both been killed in that explosion, who would legally inherit your home, your retirement, your savings, and the land? If one of you had survived, but couldn’t make decisions, who would decide for you? Because if it’s not clearly documented, those estranged relatives could end up with everything. Is that what you want?

She answered immediately, “No. I’d rather donate everything to animal rescue than let them have it.”

I reminded her, “If it’s not in writing, your wishes aren’t guaranteed to be followed.”

That was the wake-up call.

She admitted she had thought about it, but hadn’t acted. “Thank you for bringing this to my attention,” she said. “We have a lawyer. I’m calling first thing next week.”

This is what “get your affairs in order while you still can” really means.

Disclaimer: All content is provided for educational and informational purposes only and is based on my personal and professional experience as an occupational therapist. It is not intended as legal, medical, or financial advice. Names and details have been changed to protect privacy.

If you don’t decide in advance who will protect your wishes, the law will decide for you, and it may not choose who you would have.

If this story made you uncomfortable, it’s worth asking why, and what you’ve been avoiding.